Narcissists Don't have Real Friends | They've Enablers

Narcissists do not have any genuine or real friends because they cannot form connections; everything in their life is purely transactional. You might argue and say, ‘Well, they are surrounded by a lot of acquaintances. What is that all about?’ These ‘friends’ are not actually their friends; they are either narcissists themselves who enable their own ego through the narcissist’s ego or enablers and minions who perform a specific role or function in the narcissist’s life. Let’s talk about all of this in depth and detail in today’s episode.

Reason number one: Narcissists do not have friends; they have hostages.

Every single person in their life is supposed to, or expected to, perform a specific role. For example, if it’s your narcissistic partner or your parent who lives for their image, what is your role in their life? Or what could be your role to uplift that image? That means a lot of pressure on you to keep performing, which will create a perfectionist out of you. So, you are there not to love the narcissist—they don’t care about it—and not to be loved by them. There’s no reciprocity. You are there to offer them unlimited attention, to glorify them, or to enable their eternal victimhood, depending on the type of narcissist you are dealing with. They do not care about who you are. In their narcissistic brain, you are not perceived as a separate individual with a typical personality; you are perceived similarly to the way they perceive a piece of furniture. What is the use of the chair in their life? They use it to sit. Similarly, you are a function to the narcissist. You cook and clean; you earn; you do all the things; you take care of the children. That is who you are to them. They do not know you as a person. If everything is all about performance and what they are getting out of that relationship or that situation, how can they have any true friends?