Guilt is the first emotion I want to deal with because it’s important to the narcissist that you take on the guilt or ownership for the things they refuse to take responsibility for. Guilt is an emotion that narcissists use against their victims to achieve their goals.Because as soon as you accept that guilt, the narcissist has won. Placing blame is only the start, but if you accept the blame, that is when the emotion of guilt comes in, and the narcissist will use that emotion to manipulate you further. You are the one who now needs to make amends and put things right. You are the one who now needs to do something to appease the narcissist so that they can be happy with you again.
The same thing happens when the emotion of fear is used. Whether the narcissist is openly aggressive or passively aggressive, their objective is to make you afraid of them. They want you to walk on eggshells around them. If you are afraid of the narcissist, it is easy for them to get what they want from you.
The narcissist knows that you will do everything to avoid them getting angry, and even if you do, you will work quickly to make things right in order to avoid them lashing out at you. But narcissists enjoy hurting people, so even if you haven’t done anything wrong, they will treat you as if you have whenever they feel like it. Narcissists are sadists, and they enjoy the control they have over other people’s lives and emotions. They enjoy bringing misery and pain. And if the emotion of fear is what is keeping you bound to a narcissist, they will try to keep you crippled with fear forever.
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