7 Early Warning Signs of a Narcissistic Partner

I often talk about how to recognize the subtle red flags or warning signs that might suggest someone is a narcissist or at least highly narcissistic. But what about all of the not-so-subtle signs that are often ignored or overlooked? These signs show up really early on, especially in romantic relationships, even as early as the first few dates. I’m Lise Leblanc, therapist, author, and life coach, and today I’m talking about seven overt red flags that should never be overlooked, as well as five reasons that we might ignore these warnings. At the end of this article, I will give you my best advice on how to handle these red flags.

The first overt warning sign is when a narcissist comes right out and warns you about their true nature.

So they might straight up tell you that they’re a narcissist or they may say that they’re not a good person. They might warn you that they’re unstable, cruel, or just mean. They might say things like ‘I’m not who you think I am’ or ‘someday you’ll regret getting involved with me’ or ‘I’m really messed up.’ Something like this might catch you off guard because it’s not something you would typically expect someone to say very early on in the dating aspect of the relationship. But when they say stuff like this, they’re actually warning you and testing you. They want to see how you’ll react. Will you brush it off and think that they’re just joking around or being too hard on themselves? Will you feel sorry for them? Will you try to make them feel better about themselves? Will you make an extra effort to comfort or reassure them? If so, you pass the test. And if you choose to stick around despite their warnings, they will feel like they have the green light to treat you poorly because, after all, they did give you the heads up.