Narcissists are always quick to make others seem like the bad guy or the one who messed up when it was always them. And because the Covert Narcissist cares more about being liked and accepted by everyone apart from those closest to them. They are willing to side with people who hate you. They are willing to gossip and slander you with these people. They are happy to play the victim to your enemies to gain sympathy. Basically, your enemies will become the Narcissist’s allies. As a result, the Narcissist can never defend you or protect you because it is more important for them to be liked by outsiders.
The Covert Narcissist can only offer their fake support behind closed doors. They will convince you that they are on your side and that they are against whoever it was that wronged you. But the Narcissist will do nothing more. And to add insult to injury they will smile and be chummy with the same people who have hurt you. It is not just about gathering flying monkeys to destroy you, it is also important to them to appear as the reasonable, friendly, forgiving, kind-hearted one. It would almost seem like that anyone you happen to have a problem with the Narcissist will start getting cozy with them. And for the people you do get on with, if they get close to the Narcissist the further apart you and they become.
The Covert Narcissist seems determined to get as many people in their corner as they can. And it is usually by devaluing and slandering those closest to them. Covert Narcissists also prefer to avoid confrontation and are willing to act as mediators. It is not about keeping the peace. It is the fact that they are cowards and do not want to be involved with anything that can taint their image. But this is one of the reasons why people can end up feeling so alone in Narcissistic Relationships because they come to realise that the Narcissist does not have their back. only how to use people for their advantage.
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