They are trying to get reactions from people, so they generate a false self. It’s a big performance, but what does that mean? It actually means that the narcissist is very vulnerable. If you are in the middle of a narcissistic abusive relationship, you will see this overblown image of the narcissist which is how they want you to see them – they’re all-powerful, they’re sexy, they’re an alpha female, an alpha male, whatever their nonsense story is or they’re the biggest martyr in the room, they’re the biggest victim you’ve ever known, they’ve suffered more than anybody else ever has, they’re Christ himself down from the cross. That would be more in line with covert narcissism or vulnerable narcissism, but they’re the biggest and best at something even if they’re the biggest and best at being tortured, abused and abandoned. That’s what you believe when you’re in the middle of it, but when you look again, you’ll see the whole thing is an incredibly fragile, incredibly delicate facade that’s actually very easily broken.
So, if you threaten to expose them, what are you threatening to expose? What you’re threatening to expose is this is how they show themselves to the world, this is how they’ve shown themselves to this person, this is how they’ve shown themselves to this institution, this is how they’ve shown themselves to this industry, but you have evidence that, in fact, the real person is like this because of the PTSD element, the trauma-based element, there is a massive amount of splitting in narcissistic personality formations, there’s a massive amount of black and white. So typically, not always, but typically, what their real feelings about any subject are, are the opposite. So they present as being very loving and very kind to, let’s say, animals, they do lots of charity work with animals, but you live with them and you know personally, despite all this virtue signaling for the outside world about how much they care about animal cruelty and so on and so forth, you actually see them treat animals with either contempt, cruelty, or total indifference.
So, that’s just a small example of something that could expose the truth of who they really are that ruins the false self-image that they’re projecting to the world that would permanently damage a source of narcissistic supply. You don’t have to actually do this; the fear that it might happen is what will torture them and create a huge amount of mental anguish. Please use the information I have given you here for the highest good of all concerned. If you’re in an abusive relationship, don’t abuse the abuser; simply leave, go to therapy, heal, reduce their significance in your life, get on with your life, and live a good life for the highest good of all concerned.
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