Now, you’re going to take action, in a very calm tone with no anger, and no resentment, no loss of control. You’re going to exercise emotional discipline and you’re going to state we’re adults and if there’s something bothering you, we need to talk about it. I’m going to leave since right now you don’t want to talk, I’m going to leave for two hours, give you time to think about how what you want to say, when I come back, we can discuss whatever is bothering you. Do not cry, do not beg, do not say I’m leaving and then wait for a reaction, don’t wait in the bedroom hoping that they’re going to come to the door and stop you and prevent you. Even if they say no I want to talk now, say well like I said I’m leaving for two hours I’ll be back. why is that? why if they say they want to talk now?
Because once again their whole idea is to control you, and by you allowing yourself to be controlled, you stay in a very helpless state of mind, you don’t realize that you have any power. So, by stating something and following through you’re really empowering yourself to say “wait a second I can have boundaries and I can enforce them”
4 make sure you leave
Don’t stay, don’t look sad, don’t look as if they are torturing you. Yes, that’s their goal but remember, you are not helpless that is their goal but whether it gets accomplished or not is up to you. So, leave.
Take a walk, look at nature, think of things that you’re grateful for in your life, think of things that make you happy, go to a place that you love, go buy yourself your favorite coffee, go visit a friend, go do something that makes you feel good and takes your mind off of the fact that this person is ignoring you.
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