The narcissist hopes that you don’t see through all of their lies. The narcissist hopes that maybe they can get more emotional validation from you. The narcissist hopes that maybe you will still believe in them and love them the same way you did before. I don’t think they realize that once you’re done, you’re kind of done. But not for a narcissist. This is the issue here; they don’t realize you’re done. They kind of see it like, “Okay, I’ll just sidestep this situation, don’t have to provide any explanation or take responsibility for my behavior. So, I’ll just leave for a bit, and then maybe I’ll come back and see. Maybe they will want me back. I’m sure they will. Why would they not want me back?”
And I think that’s how the narcissist thinks. They think that if they leave and you get better, work on yourself, give it some time to let the dust settle, they’ll be able to come back. So, it’s kind of like a long silent treatment that happens, but in the fact that they will actually come back. And they have the idea and think that, actually, when they do come back, you’re going to welcome them with open arms.
Now, in some cases, yes, that does happen because, you know, you’re still trauma-bonded to the narcissist, and you will believe anything that they say because you’re still trauma-bonded. You’re trying to heal something; you’re trying to understand something. So, there’s no judgment here; that’s fine. There will come a point where you will be able to make that decision for yourself that you don’t want them back anymore; you’re done with all of that.
But this is what I’m talking about; the narcissist believes that they are entitled to come back, that they are going to get the same treatment from you, that everything is going to be okay. The reason why they are hoping that you will come back to them is that you can give them what you gave them before: attention, encouragement, motivation, and love. They are going to want these particular things from you, but make no mistake; they are seeking this from other people too. It’s not just you; they have other people as well whom they will be doing the same thing to. You’re not special.
10 Reasons Why Narcissists Will Come Back To You
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