- “You’re always overreacting.”
Have they told you that you couldn’t take a joke when you called them out for saying something hurtful? Did they say that you were too sensitive? A narcissist will never own up to the abuse they inflict on you but will rather trick you into thinking you’re at fault. They’ll make you second-guess yourself and, as a result, enable their bad behavior by rationalizing it, minimizing it, or making excuses for themselves.
- “Not everything is about you.”
With a narcissist, everything needs to be about them all the time. You can’t ever steal the spotlight from them, or they’ll resent you for it. They don’t care about your problems or what you’re going through. Instead, they’ll project their self-centeredness onto you and make you feel guilty or embarrassed about taking the focus away from them, even if it’s just for a second.
- “Wow, no wonder why nobody else likes you.”
To a narcissist, the key to keeping you in line is destroying your sense of self-esteem and making you feel like you have no one else to turn to. The more alienated and alone you feel, the less likely you are to leave them. They may prey on your insecurities and make you think that no one else can ever love or care for you the way they do.
- “I always defend you to everyone else, and this is how you repay me?”
When a narcissist tells you this, it’s for three reasons. Firstly, they want to turn you against the people you love by saying that they secretly hate you and talk about you behind your back. Secondly, they want to play the hero and swoop in to save the day. But mostly, they want to make you feel like you need to reward their so-called act of kindness by never speaking out against them and by paying them back with more loyalty, praise, and obedience.
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