One of the first things a narcissist will search for when they attack you is your connections to a self-centered person. A narcissist will interfere with every friendship and family interaction. They will create a case against everyone close to you and discredit them in order to show themselves as trustworthy. An attempt to separate you from others will be made by sowing distrust among those who, in their view, are too close to you.
The narcissist hopes that you will abandon them or that they will abandon themselves. When a narcissist takes advantage of you, you cannot seek assistance from anybody else because they want exclusive access to you. Your sense of self-worth is the second target of the narcissist attack. They will become far more judgmental and critical of everything you do. It is always surprising how quickly a narcissist can switch from boosting your confidence to tearing you down after doing the reverse, because they are capable of doing so and incredibly effective.
Therefore, when they abruptly change their conduct and do the opposite, you may conclude that their criticisms and devaluations must also be legitimate. They will not only critique your words but also your behavior and physical appearance. This ultimately causes you to question your reality, to cast doubt on your sanity and ability. They will cause you to believe falsehoods, and they will stare at you in an insulting or rude manner. If given a chance, they will have little issue becoming angry or annoyed with you instead of uplifting you. They will try everything they can to undermine you, they will not pay attention to what you have to say. Over time, they will gradually cause you to question your worth, beauty, and intelligence.
A very wonderful book: Becoming the Narcissist’s Nightmare: How to Devalue and Discard the Narcissist While Supplying Yourself (English Edition)
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