Things Narcissists Do When You Go No Contact

When we do what we need to do to break free from this type of toxic dysfunctional certainly, and destructive relationship dynamic, we’re going to go through some withdrawal. It’s going to be uncomfortable. And in my opinion and experience, sometimes that discomfort can go on for weeks, if not a few months, right? As we ride that wave. And establishing and maintaining no contact can be the difference-maker in whether or not we get to the other side.

 Again, no different than the alcoholic who puts the cork in the bottle or the drug addict who puts the drug of choice down. If you’re white-knuckling it in your withdrawal as you attempt to break free from this dysfunctional and painful dynamic, if you’re white-knuckling it and not actually just putting the drug down or the cork in the bottle, as opposed to actually doing the deep dive healing and recovery work. Here’s what’s true. Not only is relapse on this toxic, painful, dysfunctional relationship likely. It’s almost guaranteed. It’s almost guaranteed.

So we go no contact out of a sense of self-preservation. And because we get to a place of realizing that we need to do what we need to do to take care of ourselves, because this is not going to change. They don’t change, right? So we go no contact out of self-preservation. But if we don’t actually support ourselves with a solid support system and deep dive healing and recovery work to deal with the issues that brought us into that dynamic to begin with, the likelihood that we’re going to end up getting sucked right back into that toxic abuse cycle is really, really high. And I mean really, really high. So just something to keep in mind as we dive into this conversation. Don’t just put the cork in the bottle of that toxic, painful, destructive relationship.

Actually prepare to A, surround yourself with a solid support system of people who A, actually get it. And B, are living in the solution, not just regurgitating the problem all day long, but actually focused on solutions that work. And B, get yourself into some form of formal healing and recovery work specific to these issues so that you’re not white-knuckling it through no contact. And you are far less likely to get pulled back into that painful destructive dynamic at any point in time. Makes a big difference.

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