Another thing that you will witness as the narcissist ages is that the abuse they subject others to is going to increase in frequency and intensity. One of the main reasons this happens is because they are going to be losing the levels of narcissistic supply that they have become dependent on. So, as the levels of narcissistic supply decrease, that will cause them to have more and more narcissistic injuries or blows to their inflated ego. When that happens, that hits their true self that feels very vulnerable and inferior, which in turn will cause them to become very upset and emotionally disregulated. When that happens, the way they emotionally regulate themselves is through abusing and humiliating other people. They essentially project those horrible feelings and beliefs they have about their true self onto those around them. Many times, they will fly into a very frightening narcissistic rage. That is how they neutralize or equalize the narcissistic injury they received. When the rage is over, the false self feels empowered and is back in the driver’s seat, and they feel better. All is good in their world again, but they couldn’t care less that they have made everyone around them suffer through the horror of their abuse. Because they feel better, they expect everyone they just abused and emotionally assaulted to be completely over it when they are. It’s quite shocking to watch a narcissist go from a violent rage to a quiet and calm and controlled demeanor in a matter of minutes. I remember those days very well. My father would have a terrifying rage where I’d be crying so hard I was hyperventilating. When it was over, he would look right at me and tell me to go wash my face. That’s how I knew the rage was over, and now I had to get myself together and act as if nothing happened. That’s a very surreal and incredibly confusing experience for a child to try and make sense of and process, but that’s how these people operate.
Another thing you will see as the narcissist ages is how truly pathetic they really are. You will see how desperate they are to obtain narcissistic supply. You will witness how the delusional and irrational thinking becomes more and more outrageous and completely illogical as they age. The mask they wear starts to slip off more and more, revealing a very damaged, desperate, abusive, delusional, and pathetic human being. You will witness their inability to be happy and content the way other older people are who are surrounded by their loving families. You will see their attempts at manipulation start to fail, and the lies they tell become simply desperate and pathetic. You will see the panic they exhibit in their desperate attempts to gain control over the beliefs, perceptions, and lives of others. It’s incredibly sad to watch, and they are unable to help themselves. They are incapable of self-reflection; they refuse to take accountability for anything they have done, and they will continue to promote this phony and false narrative that they are somehow the hero, the victim, or the martyr in the lives of their loved ones. They will become angry and bitter that they cannot con people the way they used to and will feel more and more victimized by their inevitable loss of control. They become more dependent on others, which all narcissists hate, and they become much needier than they were when they were younger.
What Goes on in a Narcissist’s Mind When They Miss You
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