Narcissists may all seem similar, but they come in many forms. Some are more in front of you than others, and a passive-aggressive narcissist is a dangerous person who people realize.
Now, for those who don’t know, passive-aggressive narcissists are more passive-aggressive narcissists than most. Passive-aggression is basically a more secretive way for them to take control of their victims and most narcissists who use this kind of thing have mastered it. Rather than attacking you directly, this narcissist will be much more indirect with their actions and can be quite frustrating to deal with.
That being said, anyone who is a little more passive-aggressive than most is not a narcissist. Narcissists do the things they do with a specific intention, and you need to keep that in mind. Rather than becoming visibly angry or hostile, these narcissists will hit you where it really hurts. Because of such things, identifying these types of narcissists is not always as easy as we would like it to be.
That being said, below I will review some signs that show you are dealing with a passive-aggressive narcissist and how they work to get in your head. They may not seem like much, but they add up to something sinister. Don’t become a punching bag for someone like that.
8 signs that you’re dealing with a passive-aggressive narcissist:
1- They make a lot of excuses and never really follow through.
These types of narcissists are excellent at making excuses for why they don’t do the things they should do. If they don’t want to do something, they won’t do it, but they will find a reason they don’t do it. Normally, narcissists just say no and leave it at that. However, because a narcissist wants to be on your side in some respects, an apology is necessary.
2-They forget things on purpose.
This kind of narcissist will voluntarily forget things. For example, if you ask them to stop by the store on their way home to pick up food for dinner, they will say they forgot even though they didn’t do it. That’s how you must go back and do it yourself. While this is not a huge control, it gives them the upper hand in many situations.
3- They give you things you don’t want.
For vacations or just gatherings, they will give you things you don’t want to do just so they can keep them over your head later. For example, they might buy you a pink shirt knowing that you hate the color pink. Rather than telling them you don’t like it, you will try to spare their feelings, and they will then, in heated situations, tell you thing like “you never wear that shirt, I have you”, and so on.
4- They are constantly blaming you for things you have nothing to do with / control.
Narcissists like these always blame things on the people closest to them. For example, if they go to the grocery store and forget to take something specific, they will blame you for not reminding them to get it. That’s even when they have a whole list of things they need. Yes, sometimes we face that kind of extreme.
5- Their sense of humor is apparently hostile.
These kinds of narcissists will hurt your feelings and just say they were joking. They say the meanest things and get offended when you let them know how to hurt you are because they are just “playing”. The narcissist wants all the attention, so moving them into this kind of situation is easy enough for them while tearing you down.
6- They make you feel bad when you cannot do things for them.
Narcissists in this category want you to feel bad most of the time. If you tell them you don’t, the guilt trips begin. They will try to make you feel as if you have to give in and as if you are hurting them by not doing so. The more you resist, the more persistent they become.
7- They appear to be very condescending.
Regardless of what you talk about, this narcissist will always seem a little condescending overall. They feel that they are better than you and will subtly suggest this to you. Although not everyone realizes it after a while, it will be something you can’t ignore.
8- They are among the most prominent gas lighters.
Narcissists are excellent for gaslighting, but passive-aggressive ones are easily the best. They will do everything possible to make their partners feel crazy. The more they do this, the more control they gain, and they know it all too well.
The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist
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