It’s critical to express how the person makes you feel without pointing fingers or assigning blame. Ignore phrases like “You make me feel…” to start the dialogue on a neutral footing. Begin with something that reflects your own feelings. “When I hear you say…”, for example, “I feel really sad or furious.”
Putting your thoughts down on paper, in an email, or even in a text message will allow the other party time to consider and react to what you’re thinking. Remember that you have no say of how the other party reacts, but you do have control over how you convey your emotions.
Perhaps the abusive person will become defensive or furious and leave the relationship, or perhaps he or she will want to make amends. Regardless of how they react, voicing your feelings is a crucial phase in either mending or ending a relationship.
Make a choice.
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