Certain habits lead a couple to be in a bad mood, and we are not always aware of them. What are these toxic habits? Here are the top 9 toxic habits that you need to stop right now!
Toxic couple habits can create the illusion for some people that their current partner is not the right person for them. Sometimes, this could be the truth. In other cases, however, it’s a good bet that eliminating these toxic habits could eliminate many relationships “problems”, improving (or even saving) a failing couple.
Your relationship with your partner exists as a separate entity from each of you. Just as individuals have difficulties, so do relationships as a couple. Just as with your body, whatever you “feed”, your relationship will be reflected in its overall health. If you want to eliminate disease and negativity, purge your relationship of these 10 toxic couple habits:
1. Not expressing gratitude to your partner
We all need validation and recognition. Most of us want to hear it from the person we love the most: our husband or wife. The lack of positive expression in a couple makes people feel taken for granted. After months or years of feeling unrecognized, it’s not uncommon for someone to stop “trying” to please their partner or for the other person to seek appreciation elsewhere. Say “Thank you,” “I love you,” and “I appreciate you” regularly.
2. Do not support your partner’s dreams
People often have good memories of the beginning of their relationship. At the beginning of a relationship, thanks to dopamine, people talk about their dreams, which all seem magical. Unfortunately, after a while, reality strikes. People see the world and their partners more critically. Individuals forget how precious dreams are and that they need to be treated with care. Partners destroy the hopes and ideas of their loved ones. This is painful and damaging. The silencing of a person’s dreams may be evidenced by a lack of expression in the relationship. Coincidentally, it is the next toxic habit a couple has on this list.
3. Lack of communication within and about the relationship
Communication is a must in any couple. Without being able to articulate the fears, wounds, hopes, and desires of each other, partners become disconnected. Individuals should allow each other the freedom to express themselves without the constant fear of judgment, drama, or conflict. The free flow of ideas and communication is one of the greatest assets that bring your relationship to life.
4. Lack of self-confidence and self-love
The healthiest relationships come from two people who are secure, confident, and aware. When one or both people in a couple suffer from a lack of self-esteem, jealousy and insecurities often manifest themselves in the relationship. These two things are potentially deadly couple habits for any relationship. If you want to eliminate jealousy and insecurity, focus on loving and accepting each part of who you are first. You are each perfect in your own way.
5. Letting go (physically and behaviorally)
As time goes by in a relationship, people relax and let go. This can wreak havoc on a couple’s sex life when health problems arise because of an inability to eat well and exercise.
Whether you’ve been in a relationship for two years or twenty years, stay on top of things. Do this not only for your partner but most of all for yourself! It’s better to do, act, and be the best person you can be. It will also do wonders for your couple.
6. Forgetting to include your partner in your projects
If you want your relationship to go wrong, nothing could be easier, just forget about integrating your partner into your daily life. If you don’t tell your partner your dreams, goals, or meal dates, you could leave him or her feeling abandoned, excluded and unprepared. These things lead to resentment, anger, and disconnection.
You don’t have to ask your partner’s permission. You can ask your partner for support. All you have to do is tell your partner what you want to do and where you want to go for lunch…and in life.
7. Make your partner your last priority
Your children are a top priority if you have any. And so is your job. And so are you. And… so is your partner. How do you balance all these things? That’s the million-dollar question, my friends. Anyone in a relationship negotiates that answer, especially if there are children involved.
You don’t always balance everything perfectly. Recognize that fact. The most important thing to remember, however, is not to forget your partner on this list. Talk to your partner about how overwhelmed you feel. Get ideas about how each of you can make the other feel like a “priority” with all those competing interests that attract you. Express how much you care about each other.
8. Letting physical intimacy in your relationship diminish
We all have very busy lives. People often feel exhausted. They forget to look at their partner in the eye, kiss passionately, hold, and even touch each other. This lack of physical intimacy can lead to the feeling that a partner doesn’t love you. Physical intimacy with someone you love heals the soul. It strengthens (and helps maintain) the bond between two people. Keep intimacy alive in your relationship. Practice touching yourself. Read books to help keep the fire alive. See two therapists if you are disconnected from your partner or need help to reconnect to your partner.
9. Don’t change your relationship with your partner
Without the evolution of the relationship, your couple will die. Remember that if you want to win gold in your relationship, you must be prepared to dig deep with your partner. Problems and conflicts are your opportunities to dig into the soul of your beloved, plant new seeds, and continue to grow together.
Approach your partner’s change and your relationship with the wonderful eyes of an explorer. In doing so, you will continue to discover new things every day. It will keep you out of a relationship rut and into something fresh, changing, and always exciting.
These toxic couple habits are subtle and sometimes silent. If they are not controlled over time, they will kill your relationship. Get in the habit of looking at yourself and see how you can improve for you and your partner. By doing so, you reduce the chances that the habits will take root and wreak havoc on your heart and home.
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