Narcissists are jealous people. They don’t want to be left behind in a group. If someone gets a new motorcycle, narcissists must have one too, but nicer and cooler than the one their competitor bought, even if there’s no real competition. Narcissists often pick fights with people they consider competitors, although most of these competitors are unaware of the one-sided battle. Once narcissists feel they’ve outdone their competitors, they assume the competitors are envious of what they have, even though they are the ones burdened by this one-sided competition.
Narcissists’ high sense of importance also influences their thinking, instilling in them the belief that others envy them. But the reality is too scary for narcissists to face: they are often filled with jealousy and insecurity about other people’s lives. They believe their own life isn’t enough for them to survive.
Number 5: Critical Inner Voice
Are you wondering how a critical inner voice works for narcissists? This voice helps them ignore and bury their insecurities. The critical inner voice is a destructive thought process that develops from painful experiences, shaping our perceptions of ourselves, others, and the world around us. This cruel internal coach is in charge of our negative inner dialogue. A visual representation of this is seen in movies, where a little devil-like figure whispers in your ear, or your thoughts overwhelm you to the point of fainting.
However, critical inner voices can also be self-soothing and self-aggrandizing. Most narcissists direct their critical inner voices toward others, putting them down to make themselves feel better. Instead of projecting this negativity onto themselves, narcissists criticize and condemn others. As a result, they protect themselves from their own hurtful thoughts and thrive on the torment of others.
Understanding the mind of a person takes ages. We sometimes have difficulty understanding ourselves—how much harder is it to understand someone else, especially a narcissist? It could take generations to have a breakthrough in this field of study. As much as possible, we should still treat narcissists kindly; after all, they are still human beings who need constant love and care. But if you know someone with narcissistic tendencies, therapy might be a good suggestion. Don’t try to be their fixer—someone more capable than you can do that job, and that will work best with the narcissist’s cooperation.
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