This Is What the Narcissist Secretly Thinks About You Now: After a Long Separation 

Loss feels different to a narcissist. It’s not the absence of love that haunts; it’s the absence of access. You were a well of reaction, of attention, of emotional energy. That was the supply. And when you shut it off, when you vanished without another performance, it ripped something open in them. They scramble for meaning. They project, they blame, but it never sticks. Because deep inside, they know exactly what they lost and why. And oh yes, they think about you. Don’t let the silence fool you. They wonder if you’re still thinking about them, if you’re scrolling, checking, reaching back through the past. They picture you smiling again. They imagine someone else holding your joy. And that tears at the very center of the illusion they built. Because if you’re whole again, if you’re thriving, that means they never broke you. And that truth burns.

They remember the way your eyes softened when you believed in them, the tone of your voice when pain cracked your spirit. They remember the grace you offered, the patience you poured out like water on barren ground. And now they sit with that memory knowing they will never taste that kindness again—not like that. Not from you. And in the dark, when no one’s watching, the narcissist revisits the ruins, rereads your messages, scrolls through the pictures, listens for your name in circles you once shared. They’ll never admit it. They’ll deny it. But the interest isn’t curiosity; it’s torment. Because if you’ve healed, if your glow is back, then they’ve lost not just a person; they’ve lost power, they’ve lost proof of their grip. And that loss keeps growing.

But here’s the thing: time doesn’t soothe this wound for the narcissist. It twists it, changes it, turns it into a curse that follows. Even with someone new in their life, the past doesn’t rest. They compare. They crave what they once controlled. And when the new supply doesn’t give the same fuel, doesn’t ignite the same flames, it only reminds them of what slipped through their hands. You see, you weren’t perfect, but you were real, present, invested, alive with emotion and hope, and they took that as their due.

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