This is why the narcissist distorts reality: the truth is dangerous, accountability is intolerable, and the concept of genuine introspection is entirely foreign. The narcissist will never sit across from you and say, “You know what? I’ve spent years emotionally dismantling you, and I think it’s time I change.” That day will never come; there is no epiphany, there is no awakening.
Over time, something else happens. The narcissist ages; the tactics that were once sharp lose their edge. The ability to attract new supply diminishes, and desperation increases. The decay accelerates. The aging narcissist faces a new and terrifying reality: irrelevance. Perhaps the narcissist in your life is an entitled adult child draining finances under the guise of need, exploiting familial ties for perpetual support. Decades pass, and one day the realization dawns: the bank account is dwindling, the demands are endless, and the entitlement is insatiable. The question arises: has it cultivated independence? No, it has only fueled dependency.
You’ll never trace where that money vanished, but one thing is certain: it’s no longer in your bank account. And once the narcissist realizes your financial reservoir has dried up—and let’s hope it hasn’t—that’s when the phone calls stop. The affectionate texts evaporate, and the false concern dissipates. Why? Because the narcissist isn’t interested in you; they’re interested in what you can provide. The moment your resources are depleted, so is their investment in you. Until then, they’ll bleed you dry, siphoning every last drop before discarding you like an empty vessel.
This is why severing ties is non-negotiable. It doesn’t matter if the narcissist is a spouse, an adult child, a sibling, or a so-called friend. These individuals don’t evolve; they don’t seek self-sufficiency; they aren’t striving for independence. No, their existence revolves around exploiting the energy, finances, and emotional stability of others to sustain themselves. This applies universally, including romantic entanglements. Maybe the relationship spanned a year, a decade, or an entire lifetime. Maybe there was a wedding; maybe there wasn’t.
But at some point, the shift occurred. The intoxicating high of love bombing, the euphoric illusion of fairy tales and unconditional devotion gave way to a sinister undercurrent. What was once laughter and warmth turned to slammed doors, cold shoulders, and words twisted like knives. You stopped being partners and became strangers who occupied the same space, tethered by emotional shackles you didn’t even realize had been fastened.
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