What they want is narcissistic supply—your time, your attention, your energy. That supply props up their ego and feeds the fantasy of who they believe they are. It can come as praise, pity, emotional reactions, or power over someone else. And they can’t survive without it. Narcissists are like sharks. They have to keep moving, keep scanning, keep fishing. If they stop, if they don’t find a target, they start to collapse from the inside out.
So, every room is a new opportunity. Every person is a potential source. They’re not resting; they’re not connecting. They’re watching for openings, small signs that you’ll hand over your time, attention, or energy. And they’ll find out fast by pressing on one of three specific boundaries. To them, these aren’t yours; they’re resources, and you’re just the delivery system.
For our purposes here, let’s think of boundaries in a super simple way. A boundary is something that you can draw a line around, something that you own, like a fence around your yard. Inside the fence is yours, and outside the fence is not yours. By the way, if you want help assessing the level of risk you’re dealing with, I’ve created a free narcissist protection checklist, and it’s quick and powerful; it’s in the description below.
Check These Behaviors
A narcissist is always checking to see if they can press a button and make you change your behavior. To test your time boundaries, they’ll wait until you set a small one, like saying you’re heading out, going to bed early, or taking time off next week. Then they press, maybe with guilt, maybe with excuses, maybe with passive aggression, and they watch. They’re not testing what you say; they’re testing what you do. If you shift your schedule, delay your exit, or give in to the guilt, they learn that you’re someone whose time can be taken.
Continue reading on the next page
Sharing is caring!
Leave a Comment