Imagine being intimate with your partner for months or even years, and out of nowhere, they expect something new—without discussion, without exploration—just a harsh demand. When you don’t meet their exact expectations, they snap.
They may say things like:
“Come on, it’s not that hard,” or
“You’re not doing it right.”
But the frustration isn’t really about you. It’s because someone else—possibly your friend—has already shown them how it’s done. Now, they’re comparing you to that person. Narcissists don’t see you as an individual with your own comfort zone or learning curve. If Sarah, your friend, can do it, they believe you should too.
This can crush your self-esteem, making you feel inadequate—when in reality, they’re betraying you and using you as a comparison tool.
Sign 2: Calling You by the Wrong Name
They accidentally call you by someone else’s name during intimate moments—often someone you both know—and then gaslight you when you confront them.
This is one of the most devastating signs. Imagine being at your most vulnerable, and your partner suddenly whispers another name—not just a random one, but the name of someone familiar: a friend, coworker, or even a sibling.
When you react, they’ll say:
“I never said that.”
“You’re hearing things.”
“Stop being paranoid.”
This isn’t just a mistake—it’s a psychological slip. Their mind is revealing who they’re really thinking about. And if that person is someone you know, it’s a flashing red sign.
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