A third way narcissists like to end relationships is by manipulating their partners into ending the relationship first. This occurs when the narcissist realizes the only way they can play the victim is if the other person discards them. They tend to do this by making their partners jealous. A favorite tactic of the narcissist is talking about their ex. Some may even spend time with the ex, especially if the ex is the new supply, and make their partner aware of it. The narcissist claims innocence but hopes they are doing enough to make their partner want to leave them. They may become more difficult to deal with, standoffish, or give silent treatments, but nothing solid enough to label them as the bad guy. The narcissist tries to drive their partner to push them away so that they don’t have to take responsibility. When you finally tell them it’s over, there will be no resistance on their part because this is what they wanted. This messes with your head even more, as the narcissist has made it clear through their actions that they do not care and are unwilling to work on anything; they are just happy to leave.
In conclusion, when the narcissist wants out, someone will get hurt, and it is not the narcissist. Whichever way they choose to end it, it is usually for their benefit alone. There is typically no closure or clear explanation as to what went wrong, nor are they willing to take accountability. Naeorcissists do not care who they hurt; all they care about is fulfilling their needs and wants.
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