Have you been dealing with a covert narcissist? If so, you probably know how frustrating and damaging their behavior can be. Covert narcissists are, in many ways, the worst kind of narcissist. I know this firsthand—I’ve dealt with several in my life, at least two of whom had a significant impact on me.
But did you know that covert narcissists actually sabotage their own lives? In this article, I’ll go over six ways they do this. You’ll want to read until the end because it’s truly eye-opening. While they may be experts at making your life miserable, they are also unknowingly setting themselves up for failure.
Being entangled with a covert narcissist is like experiencing “death by a thousand cuts.” The harm they inflict is subtle and accumulates over time. Often, others don’t see it, and even you might not recognize it at first.
It’s like the famous metaphor of the frog in boiling water. If you drop a frog into boiling water, it will jump out immediately. But if you place it in cool water and slowly heat it, the frog won’t notice the danger until it’s too late. That’s exactly how dealing with a covert narcissist feels—the manipulation is so gradual that by the time you realize what’s happening, the damage has already been done.
1. They Can’t Control Their Emotions
While covert narcissists often appear composed in public, they frequently lose control behind closed doors. Eventually, their true nature slips out at the wrong moment, in front of the wrong person, or in the wrong situation.
This lack of emotional regulation leads them to sabotage relationships, careers, and even business opportunities. Many covert narcissists regret their outbursts, but their inability to manage their emotions keeps them trapped in a cycle of self-destruction.
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