Narcissists foolishly believe they are the smartest people alive. They think they have the biggest brains, know it all, and force you to live in fear of inescapability. They want you to believe they can predict your every move and that you are stuck with them forever. But what if I told you the opposite is true? They cannot predict everything about you. In fact, you can predict their moves because they are unintelligent, lack self-awareness, and tend to repeat the same reactive patterns across different situations.
No matter how much information they gather about you, they cannot predict these five things. This realization is a game-changer.
1. Your Unpredictable Breaking Points
Narcissists cannot predict your breaking point. They can’t tell when you will finally say, enough is enough. They constantly test boundaries, gathering data, analyzing your reactions, and manipulating you with high highs and low lows.
When they idealize you, they place you on a pedestal. When they devalue you, it’s not enough to make you walk away. The moment they sense you are about to leave or burn the relationship to the ground, they reveal their “nice” side. This behavior is not limited to partners; narcissistic parents do the same. When a child begins to break free from enmeshment, they temporarily become the “nice” parent to reel the child back in.
This tells us they are paranoid and constantly on edge, trying to predict your feelings, thoughts, and actions. They adapt their behavior based on your responses, knowing that if they remain overtly abusive, they risk being shunned. To keep you predictable and emotionally involved, they use your emotions—such as anger, sadness, or grief—as weapons. For example:
- If you stay angry, you’ll try to defend yourself or prove them wrong.
- If you feel sadness, you’ll try to repair the relationship.
- If you feel grief, you may bargain for one more chance to fix things.
Once they sense you’ve reached your threshold, they breadcrumb you—offering just enough to make you believe they are a good person.
2. Your Resilience: Bouncing Back Stronger
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