Number 4: They engage in impulsive, even reckless behavior. When narcissists are left alone with their thoughts, they can start to feel deeply insecure, sometimes even accompanied by a strong sense of shame. That’s because even though they try to project a perfect image to others, they might realize they still have flaws, too. And to them, that’s not acceptable. But instead of working on their flaws, they’d rather deal with these uncomfortable feelings in an unhealthy manner. For instance, they often turn to quick fixes like substance use, impulsive shopping sprees, or having one-night stands and engaging in other risky sexual behaviors. These actions provide them with a brief escape from the emotional struggles they’re experiencing.
Number 5: They replay interactions and conversations. You now know that narcissists tend to ruminate when they’re alone. But another thing they do during those times, aside from either thinking about how perfect they are or contemplating their flaws, is replaying their interactions with a skewed perspective. They focus on things that boost their self-image, such as compliments they’ve received, moments when they felt in control or dominant, or times they were the center of attention. These mental replays are all about maintaining their ego and sense of self-importance. Sometimes, they’ll stew over perceived slights or criticisms, too. However, instead of owning up to any flaws others pointed out, they typically twist the situation to make themselves look better. They may shift the blame onto someone else or just brush off the criticism entirely. This way, they can protect their fragile but inflated self-image.
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