10 Weird Things Survivors Do After Escaping the Narcissist

You would think freedom would inspire experimentation, like new styles and bold choices, but for many survivors, it’s the opposite. They wear the same outfit every day—the same hoodie, the same jeans, the same shoes. Sometimes, it’s because that outfit reminds them of the first day they felt free; other times, it’s to avoid being seen or judged. It becomes a kind of armor, a camouflage. Until safety is internalized, fashion takes a backseat to survival.

5. Buying in Bulk: Reclaiming Choices

Buying the same item in every color may seem quirky, but it’s a deep psychological correction. After years of walking on eggshells, every choice felt dangerous. When you finally find something you like—a comfortable shirt, a certain perfume—you buy it in every version you can. Why? Because in your brain, it’s not just a shirt; it’s a declaration: “I am allowed to want this. I’m allowed to choose this.” You’re not just shopping; you’re reclaiming power.

6. Talking to Themselves: Practicing Being Heard

You find yourself talking out loud—in the kitchen, in the car, before sleeping. You replay moments, defend yourself, and explain what you should have said. Sometimes, you speak as if someone is finally listening because for so long your words fell on deaf ears. Now, you talk to yourself to make sense of the chaos, comfort your inner child, and validate your memory. You’re not crazy; you’re healing.

7. Rearranging Furniture: Creating a Sense of Control

You move the couch, then the bed, then the bookshelf. It looks perfect to others, but to you, something feels off. Changing your environment gives your nervous system the illusion that something has shifted. Rearranging the room becomes symbolic—a physical act of reclaiming control when everything inside feels messy and disoriented.