There is a good reason why victims of narcissistic abuse develop unusual gestures. These behaviors serve as defense mechanisms. You might notice them in how survivors interact with others or express themselves. Sometimes, it manifests as a nervous habit, a specific way of standing, or even an odd facial expression. While these quirks may seem strange, they often conceal deeper feelings of anxiety, fear, or a need for control in unpredictable situations.
Let’s explore some of these unusual gestures and their meanings.
1. Constantly Looking Over Their Shoulder
After experiencing narcissistic abuse, it’s common to feel like you always have to watch your back—literally. You may find yourself frequently looking over your shoulder as if expecting something bad to happen or someone to be watching you. This behavior stems from hypervigilance, a state of constant alertness caused by prolonged exposure to psychological stress.
Dr. Judith Herman, a trauma expert, explains that victims of abuse often feel like they are living in a constant state of emergency, always ready for danger. Even when the threat is gone, your body and mind continue acting as if it is still present, making it difficult to relax fully.
How to Cope: Practice grounding techniques such as mindfulness and deep breathing to rewire your sense of safety and presence in the moment.
2. Excessive Blinking or Rapid Eye Movements
If you notice yourself blinking excessively or having rapid eye movements without a clear reason, it could be your body’s way of processing stress. Narcissistic abuse keeps victims in a constant state of tension.
Dr. Peter Levine, a trauma specialist, explains that trauma often becomes trapped in the body. Small gestures like excessive blinking indicate that your nervous system remains on high alert. It’s as if your body is trying to release built-up energy from being constantly on guard, even if you don’t consciously realize it.
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