Psychoanalyst Dr. Robin Stern, in The Gaslight Effect, explains that narcissists manipulate your perception of reality, making you question what’s normal. Over time, you may ignore gut feelings to avoid conflict—even when something feels wrong. This is a survival mechanism, not a flaw. Relearning to trust your instincts is key to breaking free and reclaiming your power.
5. Walking on Eggshells
You may constantly adjust your behavior to avoid upsetting the narcissist—fearing their reactions, whether it’s anger, silence, or manipulation.
Clinician Sherie Manning, in The Emotionally Abusive Relationship, explains that narcissists control emotions by making their reactions unpredictable. Over time, you become hyperaware of their moods, prioritizing their emotions over your own. This exhausting behavior stems from trauma. Recognizing it is the first step toward prioritizing your peace.
6. Overworking to Prove Your Worth
You may throw yourself into work as a way to escape emotional pain. You might believe that achieving more will finally earn validation from the narcissist or others.
Psychiatrist Dr. David D. Burns, in The Feeling Good Handbook, warns that tying your self-worth to external achievements creates a cycle of stress. No amount of work will ever fill the emotional void caused by narcissistic abuse.
Dr. Laura Berman, a professor of obstetrics, gynecology, and psychiatry, explains that using work as validation prevents you from addressing deeper emotional wounds. Shifting your focus from external success to self-healing is crucial.
7. Excessive Defensiveness
After enduring constant criticism, you may find yourself reacting defensively to even neutral comments.
Verbal abuse expert Patricia Evans, in The Verbally Abusive Relationship, explains that continuous verbal attacks put you on guard, making you overreact to harmless remarks. Dr. John Gottman, a relationship expert, warns that defensiveness shuts down communication. Recognizing this reaction helps you break the cycle and respond with more objectivity.
Continue reading on the next page
Sharing is caring!
Leave a Comment